"I want out of the marriage that my parents forced me into, how do I tell them and my wife?"- Mahesh KZN listener
In many cultures, the step to marriage is seen as the mark of real adulthood and an accomplishment not only for the individual, but for the respective families. Such is the case for KZN listener, Mahesh.
Listen to the podcast or continue reading down below:
According to Brides.com, it is estimated that almost half of marriages worldwide are arranged. An arranged marriage is a marital union planned by the families, typically parents, of the couple.
KZN listener, Mahesh, who is a newlywed, sent in his story to Stacey and J Sbu for the feature called: #TheFixer. Mahesh has just come to the emotionally devastating resolution that he wants out of the marriage that was initiated by both his parents and his in laws.
READ: "My mother-in-law keeps making nasty comments on the way I dress and I have had enough!"
#TheFixer is a feature on Stacey and J Sbu's show in which the duo gives KZN listeners an opportunity to share their dilemmas that they seek advice on. Together with the help of fellow KZN listeners, Stacey and J Sbu try to help the concerned party fix their problem.
READ: "Two months short of our wedding day my fiancée has confessed to cheating." -KZN listener
Even though Mahesh's marriage was not an arranged one, as he and his now wife were courting and dating prior to the wedding day, the two had no plans of marrying and their courtship was in the early stages of their friendship-turned-romance. There was an immediate over enthusiasm from both sides of their parents when they found out that the two were dating.
READ: "My wife and I are struggling to connect after having a baby" - KZN listener Pravin
Mahesh shares: "Our parents have a long history and when we started dating everyone naturally became very excited."
So, after just two months of dating, the young couple were being pressurised to walk down the aisle. Mahesh and his then girlfriend were not even thinking marriage at the time, they were just trying to get to know each other.
Listen as he shares his story in his own words in the podcast below:
The reality of a rush to be husband and wife is now unfolding in Mahesh's marriage.
The couple are struggling to find common ground, even though Mahesh shares that his wife openly expresses her love and adoration for him, he sadly feels differently.
He has come to the realisation that he has made a terrible mistake.
The weight of guilt in telling his wife how he truly feels and the weight of the disappointment and 'shame' that this will bring to both families, have him paralysed in fear.
"The decision for us to become man and wife was heavily influenced by our parents. Like many Indian weddings, ours was over the top and no expenses were spared. I do not want to hurt my wife BUT the longer this continues, the more pain I feel it will cause down the line," Mahesh shares.
If you were in Mahesh's shoes, what would you do?
This is Mahesh's story 💔 What advise do you have for him?
Posted by East Coast Radio on Tuesday, April 27, 2021
Main image courtesy of Pixabay.
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