Bye Felicia: Have you ever had to cut a close friend loose?
The 'Break-Up': Friends edition...
Some of our most treasured relationships in life are not with the people we share the same blood line with.
We are referring to the 'family we choose' for ourselves. The sisters and brothers we grow up with, experience life's highest of highs and inevitable lowest of lows.
READ: Man uses friend's advice on how to keep a girl and her response is priceless!
Which is why the ending of a friendship can be often be harder than that of a romantic kind - at least for Stacey Norman.
Friends are those people that drag you out from the depths of despair when no one else is watching; someone who has held you all night when your heart exploded and your pride was shattered; and someone who has been a hell of a lot more than just a friend. They become a sister, a partner, a roommate, a mother figure.
Her sentiments are exactly why the ending of a friendship can also be more heartbreaking than a romantic relationship. Sadly, as we get older, the truth is some friendships grow apart and with some you have to end for your own well-being.
KZN's favourite duo wanted to find out from their friends of the show if they have ever had to make that call.
READ: "My friend has given me a difficult ultimatum and it involves her ex"
To end a friendship and if so, what was the backstory to that choice? Surprisingly, it seems like many people could relate to this question - have a look at what the East Coast Radio Facebook Community had to share below:
Here are some of the stories that stood out for Stacey and J Sbu below:
- "I have cut a few friends out of my life over the last year. Those who are negative, unhappy, always complaining about others, gossiping, never see the good side, only see problems and no solution and who are just totally toxic to my life. Life is hard enough day to day. I don't need friends and family who are going to add to that. I chose happiness and positivity and I'm not sorry one bit!"- Michelle
- "I have a friend who hasn't kept in touch over the years but has resurfaced because she needs my help. I don't mind helping where I can but she expects me to assist her financially, give up my time to focus on her problems yet when everything was going well for her she was moving in other circles to the point that my teenage son doesn't know her at all. She has done it a few times and I've decided to cut her off cos when she's around I'm always"- Gugulethu
- "Yes, I cut off a very good friend of mine after she believed a story about me which she heard from her husband's friend. She heard that I was engaged to be married which was not true. Whenever I tried to ask her about it, she refused to hear my side of the story which was the truth. After thinking about it I decided not to try getting her to believe the truth as she had already believed her husband's friend so what was the use of me trying. At my mum's funeral she hugged me & kept saying she's so sorry. Sorry about what she did to me or sorry about my mum passing away? I don't know & I don't care!"- Carol
- "Sadly yes! I realised she only knew me when i could help her financially, havent had contact with her for years"-Nuemi
It is clear to see that there is a common thread in the stories that were shared:
- Cutting off friends or even family members sometimes has to be done
- One-sided friendships do not work
- Many friendships have ended because some feel that they are being used
Therapist Tamara Hill has identified the following signs that let you know that it is time to perhaps reassess your friendships:
- If they are not there for you when it matters most
- They talk behind your back
- You feel worse about yourself after spending time with them
- Not reliable, always let you down
- You do not trust them
- You no longer have anything in common
Do any of them ring true for you?
