Thandolwethu opens up about why she didn’t tell her mother she was raped
“For the longest time I blamed myself for my mom’s death,” she says.
Listen as Thandolwethu and the Urbanites opened up about the times they felt they’ve disappointed people they love.
We’ve all had those moments where we feel like we’ve said or done something that lets down the people we love - especially our parents.
For me, it was when I told my mother I’d been sexually assaulted by a man who lived in the home she’d put me up to board in when I was still at school. Years prior she’d asked me if he did anything to me and I said he hadn’t because I was afraid.
When I was 25-years-old, we were having an argument, and I just felt triggered and I blurted out that she didn’t even know that in the house she’d put me up in, I was raped on the daily.
I saw the life just drain from her at that moment because I could see she felt I had let her down by not saying anything because she would’ve done anything to protect me.
It was as if I’d robbed her of the pride of having raised me and for the longest time I blamed myself for her death cause I felt like I had broken her heart and it took a while for me to work through that.
If you've been a victim of violence and abuse, please call Stop Gender Violence on 0800 150 150.
What moment made you feel like you’d done or said something that disappointed someone you love?