"We have failed to stand up for our boys and men that also suffer abuse and mental health issues"
We celebrate Fikile Cele this Woman Crush Wednesday...
As a community, we are always there trying to bring a focus to standing up against gender based violence. But many times, we forget that gender based violence doesn't only affect women and children.
The activism against violence has become stereotyped over the years and has admittedly painted 'men' as the face of evil. The sad reality is that men and boys are also victims to violence and we should speak up for them as well.
Read more: LISTEN: Durbanite Fikile Cele - "I was abandoned in a box outside a factory in Chatsworth"
Well, this is exactly what two women are using their voices for this year as we observe respect during 16 days of activism. Fikile Cele isn't a stranger to us, she shared her story a few months ago about being abandoned outside a factory in Chatsworth as a baby.
She not only owned her history but made the bold move of sharing her story publicly, as a way of helping others. She is a young woman with a rich and soulful approach to life and she got to chat to Carol Ofori last week, as Carol's woman crush.
She shared the project called, 'Man you Rock', with us and it was such an eye-opener.
"While the majority of South Africa is focusing on Women and Children these 16 days of activism against GBV, Fikile Cele and Youandi Gilain will be focusing on boys and men this year. We have failed to stand up for our boys and men that also suffer abuse and mental health issues, we cannot support the one but not the other. Violence against men is worthy of attention." (Fikile Cele)
It is this line of thinking that motivated them to act during these 16 days of activism to educate our society that violence and abuse also happens to men and boys. And the impact on their mental health, their level of confidence, aggression, and competitiveness has been noticed.
Abuse against women and men are totally different but it is worth to be addressed. The sad part is that there is hardly any statistic on male violence, specifically sexual, as it is a hidden issues and no one wants to speak about it. We are all too scared to address and create awareness because it could distract from the crisis of GBV against our girls and women. This needs to change, our boys and men need to know that they matter too, that their pain is real, and they deserve to be heard and helped.
Fikile touches on the societal behaviour that many boys grow up around, where they are told that "Boys don't cry", "Man up", "Don't be such a baby". In hindsight, these language patterns can have damning effects on anyone, not just boys.
The project, Man you Rock, has encouraged men and boys to share their experiences and to speak up, which is a way of healing. They have created an online podium on both Facebook and Instagram, sharing stories, information, encouraging engagement and interaction for men.
"Our aim is to give boys and men their voice, allowing them to share their feelings and stories, where they will be heard, empowered, encouraged and supported and to create a network of people and organisation that are able to assist boys and men in their crisis." (Fikile Cele)
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As much as the project is fresh and new to many people, it has addressed a topic that helps our community in its entirety. Men and boys are speaking up and sharing their stories, and that has started the process of healing.
We celebrate you ladies today as our Women Crushes, thank you for being the driving forces of change and upliftment, and most importantly, healing.
Image Courtesy of Facebook