PARENTING: Dealing with a negative body image. Is it something we can stop as parents?
Is it more about how you say things, as opposed to what you say?
We believe that if you look good, you feel good. It's very much a personal experience, something that comes from within. But with that innate sense of confidence, there can also be a hard knock into reality.
And all it takes is one person saying something negative to you about your body. You can be the most confident person in the world, but somehow, someway, a person's words can pierce you to some extent...
Being a parent has its challenges, but seeing the effects of a negative self image on your child can be damning. On the flip side, seeing the benefits of positive self image can be infectious.
"A positive self-image leads to healthy lifestyle choices as well as positive thoughts and behaviours. Certain teenagers are body shamed at school or by their families, which can change their relationship with their bodies." (IOL)
Children are usually very confident and don't care much for what others have to say about them. But the effects of negative talk can damage that innocence and actually break their self image.
The concept of this was perfectly depicted by Jessica Alba in a video where she spoke about her niece's science experiment. Check out the video below - it really is all about love...
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As a parent, some of the key objectives to take away when it comes to speaking positivity into your children's lives are:
1. It's important to listen and take time to give your kids a chance to share their feelings. Too often, we try to control the situation because we think we know better. But the truth is that if we practice the pause, we could be amazed by the wisdom that our children could bring to the table.
2. Children are quite impressionable (but then again so are many adults), so when it comes to coaching them into dressing in the best way, it can be tricky. The best thing to do is to encourage them to dress for comfort. Also, practice what you preach, they will notice that and follow from your example. You cannot tell them to dress for comfort, and then wear something that is super uncomfortable.
3. Avoid projecting your own ideals of self image onto your children. Parenting is very much experiential, so sometimes we project what our parents enforced on us onto our kids. Stop and be wary of what and how you behave with your children. Stop the cycle instead of continuing the cycle.
4. Encourage healthy eating from a young age. Find a balance when it comes to the family eating habits. So don't discourage junk food, now and then, but also educate them to eat healthily. Make it a family affair rather than making it about one person or singling out a family member.
5. Take time to think about how and what you say. Sometimes it's about what words you use and the way you say things. Weirdly enough, perception about the way we say things is somehow engrained in us. Now take a moment to think about you being the reason your child feels bad about themselves... Hurts, right? All it takes is one moment, so practice the pause...
Image Courtesy of Unsplash Website